tape&glue

how about you be my tape and glue
hold me together when things fall through
the broken parts dont hesitate to mend
id rather not break, id just like to bend
and when cracks in my face let in the rain
cover them up and heal the bitter pain
i might fall and shatter on the ground
but ill get back up when you come around
i wont be dependent or needy
but these emotions aren't easy

big girl

i dont care what you say,

sometimes being a big girl in a big city

is hard to do when your doing it on your own.

i dont care for home anymore,
sometimes clothes clutter my floor
but its not the mess i run from
but the shadows on the walls.

i dont care for sleeping anymore,
the terrors still come while i lay awake
and its not the facts that shake me
but the ideas unknown.

i dont care for friends anymore,
their ears are tired from hearing my mouth
so i stay inside and play
with all these broken toys.

happy facts

i hate facts.
the girls that walk down the street; i wonder what they hate.
i wonder if they yell until the cops come?
or cry when the sun goes down?
i wonder how they keep their pretty faces so simple?
how do they keep the sadness out of their eyes?
how do they keep the guilt out of their smiles?
do shadows fall on their pastel painted walls?
are they happy?
they look happy.
all of those pretty girls...
i hate the fact that those pretty girls would probably make you happier than i can.
im not a pretty girl.
and i hate that fact.

800 W B

i never told anyone this-
but the reason why i loved the house on B, was because it had blue shutters and dormers on the roof, where Sister and i would sleep.
It looked like a real house, the one real families would live in.
Even though you just got out of jail, and the friend of court wouldn't stop calling, and the doctors wanted to put me on those little blue pills,
from the outside-
it looked exactly like it was supposed to look.