These words shall be my escape for they have been trapped a while and have never been sure since their creation. But now they must come out.
Living with a frustration so deep and intense
Continuing to surface and sink as i wallow in my despair
Numb to my surroundings
My maker shakes his head and knows the way
I continue to wallow
Continue to wait for a sign
I am never sure, never ever sure.
And my frustration is still, roots deep.
I escape to my head, yet suffer there all the same
But today it rains and suddenly i am thinking clear
Clearer
Maybe the rains forces my thoughts to slow down
To separate
Oil on water
Now i can peer closer to the bottom
At all of the sharp edges; at all the decay
Pieces of my past and present and secrets and desires
Pieces of You and me.
My mistakes and expired joys.
Ignored once more for a time, i turn away from this sight
And yearn closer to happiness
Crawl towards the ceiling
The blue cloud sky
All the clouds
For now, i let it rain and listen to my music and sip my black coffee and consider being okay for another day.
More than life-
"I want this more than life."
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